Letting go - starts now!
By Petro Booysen
Ever felt that something that you've experienced or that was done to you is holding you back?
Forgiveness or letting go is giving up a grievance, which you are entitled to. It doesn't mean forgetting or reconciliation; it doesn't mean condoning, it's not about justice and doesn't make what happened ok.
You can compare this to carrying a heavy bag full of stones around with you and then deciding to unpack that bag and no longer carry the burden with you. The act of letting go is linked to caring for yourself, and so you refuse to allow your past to continue to hurt you. Our wounds do not hurt the people who hurt us, they hurt only us, and so we release our attachment to these wounds. It is also an act to free you from the need of personal vengeance and the perception of oneself as a victim. Releasing the control that the past has over you is not betrayal, it is, however, saving yourself. Getting past your past means letting go of who you thought you were supposed to be or how you thought things were supposed to be. It is acceptance of the reality of what happened and it means living in the now. Peace can only be found in the present.
Forgiveness is something you do for yourself, not for others. Letting go or forgiveness is an act of will, where you free yourself from the claws of obsession about the hurt. Thus, closure is retrieving your spirit from yesterday. It seems impossible until you do it. So we take responsibility for our own lives and therefore not blame that which has caused the hurt anymore. This is empowering and provides healing and freedom. Keep your spirit in the present, there is only now!
“Forgiveness doesn’t excuse their behavior. Forgiveness prevents their behavior from destroying our heart.” - Unknown
Forgiveness is often something that is dealt with successfully in counselling.